Panhander

I was leaving a parking lot and there was a woman standing holding a sign. A panhandler. I’m sitting in my car and the woman looks young. I read the first couple words before I awkwardly look away. “I have two children….” I can’t look at her or her sign for a moment. A flood of thoughts and images come to my mind.

The first is Jesus as a panhandler. This is the most overwhelming and oppressive image throughout this entire experience. This provokes me to action not only with the woman but also writing this.

Jesus said what you have done to the least of people you have done for me (Mat 25). He also said “When I was hungry, you fed me, thirsty, you gave me drink….” Jesus equated action for the poor and least of society as being done for him. Not just for him as we go to church for God and pray for God and give our offering for God. But actually takes it to a serious degree as in this action happens directly to Him. By Jesus using these words he is saying, “I’m outside your window holding a sign asking for help.”

Am I awkwardly looking away from this person in need because I am selfish? Yeah. I think of the cash I have on me and it’s “my” money right. But it’s not. I have the money because God has given it to me. He’s providing for me and in a weird way, now providing for this woman.

I’m uncomfortable with her standing outside my window. The sheer desperation it takes to hold a sign and declare “I need help. I’m at the end of my rope. I don’t know what else to do.” It is so overwhelming to me.

Then I look at her. She’s not looking at me but she is looking down. Desperation. How hard it is for me to ask for help from friends never mind strangers. And she is broadcasting her need everywhere. She is declaring “Help me”.

Jesus being a panhandler becomes a beautiful image to me. Giving me an opportunity in a matter of seconds to serve Him directly. And I frantically, as the car behind me honks, pull out what little money I have an offer it. It’s not a moment where I say “God bless you” or I pull over to share Jesus or even possible ways she can get help. But in the desperation of the moment, I give what I have.